X-mas

I brought up my decision to my sister regarding Christmas and myself having no interest in receiving gifts this year and she believed it would make more sense, but then again, she isn't that bright. I have yet to tell my Christian sister, and I have told my mom, and her reaction was nothing I had expected. It seems like my mom completely thinks of me as being a person with ill intentions due to the fact that I have my own belief in life and what lies beyond. It seems that my chains are still bound to me by the family, which I have tried so hard to break. I guess, it will be a accept the gifts or the "living on my own card". I still don't understand this concept, she pointed everything out for me and had me not lift a finger or move my tongue to show that a non christian is in fact the better. Well, maybe next year.

I never understood that concept. Why is it that those that do something out of their own heart is highly regarded as someone that isn't normal? I don't do things to get my chance at that golden ticket, I do things out of my own free will. I have never verbally assaulted somebody because of their religion, it's been myself as the victim. I have never pissed on any sacred object, the closest I have to doing something along those lines is throw a bible in the trashcan in Vegas, and that was for comical purposes. I have never stood in an empty field and proclaim my beliefs. But then again, "my appearances are terrifying enough".

For those that don't know, I am a Satanist, I am not much of an atheist due to the fact that I do have my own beliefs, and I am not agnostic because I know what's the driving force. The word Satanist seems to frighten people but I assure you, I belong to no denomination of it. If there is one that I am unaware of that fits all of my complex beliefs then let me know, but as far as I know, I have not called onto any outside forces for aid in my goal of self-deification. I just follow the basic guidelines fused with my own personal beliefs and experiences. And believe me, this was hard to admit, but I can't be an atheist when I believe in the Void, myself being the God, and so on and so forth. I will elaborate on this subject throughout the existence of this blog.